“So healthy, why is the date not given?” was some comments on social networks to the story Ulyana Menshikova about the persecution of her son. But some children never learn to fight back, but to help them to protect themselves needs adults, says Oksana Golovko.
A scene from the movie “Supernatural”
- My child is being bullied at school. What to do?
- “Scapegoat” could be anyone,” – 7 misconceptions about adult bullying by Ludmila Petranovskoj
- “You have it too patient” – why is the guy being bullied in school
- In Barnaul will check the message about the persecution of a schoolboy at the Lyceum
- If the school is closed – it becomes a GULAG
Oksana Golovko
Personally, I tips from the “teach back” very, very frightening.
I was born in 1975, a common childhood – hanging out with morning to evening without parents, coming home in the winter in wet clothes after hours of riding on the sledges, the knapsacks, cardboard – what will…
To complain about in my childhood was not accepted, neither parents nor teachers. Understand themselves, learn to fight back – was the promise of a family and school.
Someone studied, someone was able to understand ourselves. And someone did not work. As, for example, did not have a classmate with the features that the other boys not only called, but also beaten, kicked, used in the game as a subject that can throw each other. School somehow all of this did nothing. When we were trying to talk with teachers, we heard that we should look at their own shortcomings, not to point out the shortcomings of others.
Yes, and I’m a normal girl, never learned to fight back. However, the problems were not in school, and in the yard, but with the same guys that studied with me. I had to run away not only from hurtful name-calling, but from the painful poking in the back. I still remember the sense of insecurity and powerlessness, mixed with scalding tears.
Adults can not tell, is not accepted in society, because you need to understand, not to be a wimp, but I’m a wimp, doormat. What a joy and relief it was to move to a new apartment, and then go to College and go almost to another dimension where they live for others, not gopnicheskuyu laws, where not to fight back…
My husband is able to fight back from childhood. But every time going to art school in the village near Kazan, he risked. Because of those muggers. Because the boy “from another area” could beat, maim, kill. It is not an exaggeration, this is the reality of the mid – late eighties.
He picked the time, the route was about adults. How would help him with his karate and the ability to fight back against the crowd of boys of different ages, often armed with all the means at hand of the type of wedge or iron chain?
Not long ago I was with a friend in the emergency room. Her nine-year-old son’s classmates was hit in the stomach, it aches, and she decided to rule out anything bad. After acceptance, coming from the doctor (because I heard the conversation), she sighed: “Here I am trying to teach him to fight back, give it to karate, Sambo, and he won’t do it”.
Surgeon – two-meter uncle with his massive shoulders and said: “Yes, Fedka is a gentle boy, do not break it.”
By the way, more Fyodor in the stomach is not received, ceased also from his portfolio disappear pencil cases and notebooks and then be under the cabinets, all this went into a serious persecution: thanks to the professional and competent reaction of the teacher. She called the parents of the offenders, each separately, with each spoke…
Well, today the kids tell their parents what’s going on with them. This is important and valuable. Maybe they felt that the need for the road.
Now it’s not about the adult world, and about the world of children. And that adults should stop violence among children, harshly, immediately, to the child who can’t fight back, didn’t swallow tears of despair and resentment as I wasn’t afraid to go out, but was convinced against brute force is the truth, is the law.
Learning to fight back need if our goal is to completely transform society into one where all concepts, or old, knew about the Good News and where there was clearly a tooth for a tooth and eye for an eye.